


Drop Dead, Gorgeous

by ClassicalStars



Category: DC Comics, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Detective, F/M, Investigation, Murder, vampire
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-02-15 19:53:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18676351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClassicalStars/pseuds/ClassicalStars
Summary: It starts with a body.As a vampire, Aderyn doesn't typically bother with affairs of the living but when a man is found dead in her hotel she can't ignore the fact this will harm her Yelp reviews. With the help of a teenage ghost and a few magical friends, she's out to find out what went bump in the night.





	1. Chapter 1

Bludhaven is gross.

The thing is, I can't imagine being anywhere else. The streets are dirty, the alleys are dangerous. It smells like ammonia for streets on end and then can switch to other less than desirable scents. I never thought what started off as a quiet little whaling town could turn into this.

What it is good for, however, is crime. Bad people who don't deserve to be in my presence, much less my meal.

My name is Aderyn Jones. It hasn't always been but I liked this name enough to take it.  I suppose the first thing I must disclose is that I am a vampire. That's right. A vampire. A vampire who sucks blood and is allergic to sunlight. I'm not big on garlic either but that's mostly down to taste. I've been around for... I don't know, at least three hundred years. I lost count for like thirty or forty years and it just was never relevant again. I've looked like I'm in my mid-20s for so long that I tell people I'm twenty-five.

I run the Jones Estate Hotel. A hotel opened on my land- that I have kept possession of since Bludhaven began- and without my consent. Still, it's actually super convenient. The Fennoli Family thought I was never coming back or that if I- or a relative, I suppose- ever came to claim the land, they would be long gone by then. Their youngest son is still in my employ now. Although they don't realise that I am the original mistress of this house.

The hotel provides a good cover and I am devastated I never thought of it. I am a great boss who doesn't take an entire family to court and even works the night shifts so that poor Joey can hide out back, getting high as the sky. Rude customers can also make for delicious meals.

Check-in lasts until 11:30 at night and you truly see all sorts in this sort of job.

For example, just before we stopped checking in guests, we had two separate parties arrive. The first was your average Bludhaven occurrence of two drunk idiots wanting to get a room. I put them on the opposite end of the hotel from the majority of the other guests. Checked in, paid in full upfront and gave them the room key. That's as typical to me now as a pizza is to a New Yorker. The second party consisted of one man. He looked almost important. Almost. His suit was a little wrinkled and he wore a look of quiet apathy. I put him in a decent enough room. He seemed like he needed something good to go for him. He paid, I gave him his room key and told him what time breakfast was.

"I hope you enjoy your stay, Mr Brown," I said, quickly reading the name from his credit card.

He eyed me for a moment before I gestured to his credit card. He let it drop. If I couldn't hear his heartbeat, I would have sworn he was suspicious of me. That same hearing picked up on the previous drunken guests starting to get busy in their room- a drawback of heightened senses.

I looked at the clock. 11:27 pm. Mr Brown cut it rather close. I waited the few extra minutes before locking the door and drawing the blinds. From here on out, my job is to make sure the place doesn't burn down with everyone inside.

I went to the break room- what used to be my spare larder- and found Joey on the couch. He was upside down with his feet resting against the aged wallpaper from the 70s and his hair brushing the ground. He had a joint in his mouth but it wasn't lit yet.

"Joey," I sighed and purposefully threw all my weight onto the couch, knocking his ribs.

He flinched and dropped the joint from his mouth. "Ow. What was that for?"

"You need to work if you want to keep your job," I told him and sat up. "Honestly, I give you such easy things to do. Make rounds on each floor. Make sure no one is smoking on the fire escape. Watching the damn security monitors at the very least."

I jabbed a thumb towards the monitors set up in the corner of the room. The security had to be toughened when I took over. Mostly because there was no security back then.

"But nothing happens and I get bored!" Joey whined.

I rolled my eyes and fished my phone out of my pocket. I opened Tinder. Tomorrow was my night off and I was starting to feel peckish. Joey peeked over my shoulder as I swiped.

"Why do you always get rid of the ones that look religious?" he asked.

I raised a hand and pushed him back without looking. "Because they are? I'm not looking for a boyfriend. I'm looking for fun."

I had to remind myself to add some emotion into the words. A hint of venom and a dash of hunger. I actually just didn't want a crucifix to burn me during a date.

"My mother calls you a gothic whore," Joey said and lit his blunt.

"Your mother calls me that to my face. She takes no prisoners," I said and paused at an interesting profile. I looked at Joey. "I think she thinks I'm going to steal your virginity."

"She's far too late for that," Joey said and took a long puff. "Not that I'd turn you down."

"I'd rather gouge my eyes out and set myself alight," I offered and stood up, moving to the security desk. I put my boots up on the desk and made sure that Joey could not see up my skirt.

The cameras were peaceful. I could still hear our drunk guests but otherwise nothing. There were no strange scents either. All quiet on the home front and everything is well. At least... for now.

* * *

At 6 am, I pulled myself upstairs. The sun was starting to creep through the blinds and I had to leave Joey in charge of passing the shift to the daytime manager. 

As part of my deal not to sue the Fenollis, I had taken one of the suites for myself. I chose one of the suites that used to be servants quarters, in the attic. I miss my spacious master bedroom but that's now called the honeymoon suite and I can only imagine the sordid goings-on behind those doors. I went up the stairs quickly and quietly, finding no one on my path.

In six hours, it would be checking out time and I am definitely not needed for that. I stumbled into my room, closing the door carefully and flopped onto the mattress. My room is quite cosy. It's big enough to move in and has its own en suite which is always a plus. I've covered the windows to block sunlight with fabric, bookcases and posters. The drawers are hotel issued but I replaced the bed with a futon. I hate hotel beds. I can't open one of the bedside tables as there's a Bible inside it so I taped it up to avoid accidental exposure.

I showered, letting the hot water run over my skin. It felt amazing. After changing, I turned on my television and crawled into bed. I've enjoyed the television since it was invented. It's always been so nice to fall asleep to. A lot of vampires would sleep in something similar to a coffin but I don't like feeling restricted like that.

I drifted off as the morning news started rattling off.

I don't normally dream and so when I do, I typically try to pay as much attention as possible. This was one such time that I dreamt. I dreamt of sounds and the feeling of hands around my mouth. The sound of breathing against my ear and the sharp, horrible pain in my neck. I saw cracks of light but just barely. I tried to scream but the movement of my jaw made the pain in my neck worse. The feeling of utter despair fell upon me...

This didn't feel like a dream anymore. This felt more like a memory. A memory of all those years ago when Raphe took me into his household as kin. My Sire did not care if the process burned like my blood was fire. He did not care if I felt like I was choking. All he cared for was another subservient wench under his wing.

If you really think about it, vampires are like multi-level marketing scams. It's all about the down lines because your down lines are there to do your bidding. They also have an emphasis on recruitment and losses in common. Illuminati confirmed? Perhaps so.

Out of nowhere, Raphe's face was burned into my retinas. Just hovering there menacingly. The sound had gone and I couldn't feel anything anymore.

A knock at my door startled me awake. I yelped and fell off my futon with a thud.

The knocks paused for a moment and then started over.

"I'm coming," I sighed and stood up. Almost immediately, I felt thirsty. I was definitely blowing off tonight's shift to find myself some asshole to feed off of.

I stomped over to the door, unhappy with the rude awakening. I opened the door and found Joey looking flustered. A dark-haired man stood behind him with perhaps the most piercing blue eyes I've seen in a few years. He wore a leather jacket with a white collared shirt and tie.

"Joey. Stranger," I greeted, a level of wariness in my tone. I looked the stranger in the eye but addressed Joey. "Joe, what's going on?"

"Something happened. One of the maids found something. Something bad, Aderyn," he said, his voice shaken.

I glanced back at my clock. I was up early. 5:45 pm. I looked back at the man behind him, noticing the badge hung around his neck for the first time.

"And you're a cop?" I asked, pointing at the badge.

"My name's Detective Grayson. I'm here with a few officers. Do you mind if we come in?" he asked.

His tone seemed earnest but I glanced back at my room. It was a bit of a mess. I never let Joey in just in case his family found out I had anything of worth.

"Uh... Joey, how long have the cops been here?" I asked.

"About an hour and a half. I only just thought of you. Thought you'd want to know as the owner..." Joey said, sounding mortified.

I gave him a reassuring smile and raised my eyebrows. "Perhaps you should go see if anyone needs any refreshments. Tea, coffee, water. Perhaps provide them with our records and the security desk?"

Joey whimpered and walked away. Once he was gone, I opened the door and let in the detective. As he walked in, I flicked the lights on. I have good vision in the dark so I didn't really need them on but when trying to pass for human...

"Your windows are covered," he noted.

"I take night shifts. I prefer sleeping during the day. Night owl and all that," I said as nonchalantly as I could. I went over to the futon and started folding up my blankets to set it up as a couch he could sit on.

"Yes, your friend mentioned that. He also mentioned you're the owner?" said Detective Grayson, looking around.

"I am. My grandmother passed it down to me when she died," I said, calmly sitting on the futon. I had gone by Margaret at that point in time. I preferred to be called Maggie. "There's a picture of her in our entrance hall. Wonderful woman. I'll miss her dearly."

That wasn't a lie. I considered Maggie a completely different person to who I am now. I was a little more uptight. A lot more proud. I hadn't yet lived through the swinging sixties. Truly, I became who I am today thanks in part to the 1980s. After a while, every name feels like a character I must play.

"Could you tell me what's happened?" I asked him.

He turned to me. "A body was discovered in Room Four. There were no signs of forced entry which leads us to suspect it was a staff member. You're the only staff that lives on site."

"Right..." I said, frowning. "Well... We have security cameras in every hall at every angle. We also have them in the stairwells. All you need to do to prove my innocence is to look at the security footage. I left Joey at about six-ish this morning. I went up the central stairwell and went straight to my room. I didn't see nor hear anything as I went either."

I leaned forward, a hand under my chin. A murder was bad for business. I mean, sure, they're a dime a dozen in this city but think about the bad Yelp reviews? I don't want my source of income to be branded Hotel Triva-don't-go.

"Do you remember anything about him when he checked in? Apparently, you checked him in at 11:35 pm?" he asked.

Oh? It was the weird guy. The one I thought looked sad... Poor guy.

"I mean... Not really. He seemed almost sad? A drunk couple checked in before him so I thought I'd put him away from them in order to let him sleep," I shrugged. "Wore a wrinkled suit. Looked tired- but then most late check-ins look tired. Hey, are you sure this wasn't a suicide?"

"In all my time as a cop, I've never seen blood splatter like this from a suicide," he answered.

I answered a few more questions for Detective Grayson before he was called away to the crime scene. He advised we shut the hotel down for the night. This was fine by me. I let Joey know as I waltz out the front door to find a drink.


	2. Chapter 2

The smell of smoke, cigarettes and alcohol filled my senses. Loud music made my brain feel like it was thumping inside my skull. The flashing lights would set off a human epileptic and I'm sure I looked odd wearing sunglasses inside a dim club.

I was still swiping on my phone to try and find any sort of match. Call Me by Blondie was playing- fitting for what I'm trying to do. I settled into a booth and relaxed my body language. If Tinder didn't work, I could definitely attract someone here.

At the back of my mind, I was racing through a plan to get into that crime scene unnoticed. I had decided to help the cops solve this murder to save my hotel but damn it, my own want for good security had gotten in my way. I needed more information to track down a killer. At least a scent. Something I could use that those human cops could not.

I noticed a few new faces amongst the dancers at the club. They weren't regulars and they didn't look too young. Almost all of them were young women. I pretended to pay attention to my phone as I watched one nearest to me. Something didn't seem right. They were almost all synchronised and I've seen drunk girls coordinate their clothing but something felt uniform in their outfits. Familiar looking...

The one nearest to me latched onto a young man. I knew him. He was a good kid. Once tried to hit a guy I was going to snack on because he thought I was being bothered. He seemed entranced. His movements slowed whilst hers grew more precise. She took his hand and pulled him towards the exit. Oh, fuck no.

I waited for a few paces before getting up and moving their direction. One of the pack started dancing in front of me. One look at her and I could see what the matter was with them. The burning hunger in her eyes and the way she kept trying to keep eye contact.

Shit. They're vampires.

"Bitch," I said, drowned out by the music and practically threw her to the floor.

She seemed more confused than hurt but it did get the attention of the bouncer. He pushed me out of the club and gave me a stern talking to. As a regular, he made it clear that this wasn't like me but blah blah blah you can't get away with fighting just because you come here so often. Honestly, I don't know this guy's name. I never cared to learn it.

I waved a hand dismissively at him and ran off, trying to find the kid and the vampire. A pack of vampires was worrying. As far as I knew, there weren't any vampire covens in town right now. Perhaps the odd lone vampire such as myself but I hadn't heard of any college sororities becoming allergic to sunlight- but then most college students are.

I ducked into an alley beside the club, aiming to climb the drain pipe and get a high vantage point. I struck lucky. Just behind the dumpster, I caught sight of her trashy gold heels. I practically dragged her by the foot and away from the kid.

"Not that kid, sorry. He's nice," I hissed, grabbing hold of her arm.

She tried to get out of my grip. She wasn't as strong as me- or perhaps couldn't find a way out of the hold. She tried twisting but my grip was firm.

"Let me go! I'm hungry!" she screeched.

"So am I but you don't see me trying to fucking prey on kids like him," I said and tossed her into the wall. I pinned her and looked back at the kid. He looked terrified. "I want you to go to Jones Estate Hotel and ask for Joey. Tell him I sent you. You'll be safe."

I didn't need to say anything more. The kid booked it before I could. I turned my attention back to the girl.

"Who is your master?" I asked her, growling in her ear.

She screamed and I pulled her head back. I pushed it back into the wall, hoping to knock some sense into her.

"Tell me who sired you or I'll fucking kill you," I said. This was a lie. I was going to kill her regardless. The crime that was bathing herself in that horrid perfume was enough of a motive for me regardless of her trying to kill an innocent guy.

"Help! She's going to-" she started again until I smashed her against the wall again, this time causing a crack on the bricks.

"Talk," I growled.

There was a slight pain in my hand out of nowhere. I didn't release my grip but it did split my attention. A bright blue metal bird had fallen to the floor, bouncing off my hand. She took advantage and got out of my grip, kicking me with her heels and running off. I looked up to find the origin of the weird blue shuriken.

A man stood on the roof and hopped down, landing effortlessly in front of me. My back was to the wall. If I wasn't confident in my strength, I would almost be afraid.

"What did you do that for? She almost killed a guy!" I scowled.

"All I saw was assault," said the man. He wore a skin-tight blue and black suit and held two metal sticks. I remembered the 70s when karate movies were all the rage. Those were escrima sticks.

"You're that Nightwing guy, aren't you?" I asked after a few seconds of silence.

"And you're the manager of the Jones Estate Hotel. I heard there was a murder there today. Maybe I've caught the culprit," he said, taking a step beside me.

The hotel! I had sent the guy running. That vampire is going to be faster and she had the address! I twisted on my heel.

"She's going to catch him before he makes it," I thought out loud.

"Wait!" Nightwing called after me.

Vampiric speed is a blessing. I ran after the scent of bad perfume and fear. She wasn't too far ahead of me. I ran, pushing my abilities to get there first out of sheer desperation.

I did catch up to her. However, I was far too late now...

The remains of the poor guy lay on the ground. He had tried to cut through a side street when she caught him. She was still feasting on him when I got there. I pulled her off him and twisted her arm behind her, scanning him for any signs of life. I couldn't hear any pulse and saw no breathing.

"You killed him," I stated, my tone flat. "Lovely."

"What is she?" an annoying voice asked behind me.

"Gee, Nightwing. She used her teeth and appears to have only gouged out his neck," I said. "I thought you would be a great detective like Batman but nope, here we are. Unable to figure out she's a vampire."

"A vampire? Alright. We need to call this death into the police and you still need to come with me," he said, approaching. He seemed awfully calm considering the killing machine in my arms.

I stopped caring to listen after that and pulled the vampire away from her victim, feeling a bit weak by now. That was a lot of power just to catch up with her and she had just eaten. I was relying on her not knowing any self-defence to get out of my grip. I pulled her along the street, trying to find the park. She managed to get out of my grip twice before I found a stick on the ground. It was thick and had been broken off its tree violently.

"What are you doing?" Nightwing asked, catching up to us.

"Killing her. She can't be left to walk around killing random civilians," I answered and grew claws from my fingers.

I heard him make a concerned noise as I straddled the girl used my claws to sharpen the stick. Once it was sharpened to a point, I rammed it into her chest and watched as she screamed and turned to dust.

I looked back at Nightwing. "I'm sure you've figured out by now that I'm a vampire, Nightwing. Unless your detective skills truly are that bad."

He held his escrima stick up towards me. "Do I need to worry about you doing what she did, Buffy?"

I grinned and didn't answer. "I've got to go break into the blood bank. I was hoping to find some ass to feed on but there are too many vampires out tonight."

He didn't follow me as I darted off.

* * *

 

I sucked the bag of blood dry, sat in front of my television. I wish I could have gotten something straight from the source but the night's events made that impossible.

There's still an officer at the hotel to keep watch over the crime scene. I could tell since Joey was clearly going through withdrawal symptoms when I got back. I made sure to check in on the floor where the officer was stood, sentry. He declined an offer of water and I made my way upstairs.

I was trying to think of how to get into the crime scene. Vampires and murder at my hotel? Perhaps they're linked. Detective Grayson did say they never saw that kind of blood splatter from a suicide. The way I see it, I could turn into mist and get in under the door but I would require that to slip by the security cameras too.

There was a knock at the door. I hid the blood bag. "Just a minute."

I sipped water and quickly ran to my bathroom to spit out any bloody residue. I went to open the door and was surprised to find Nightwing.

"Uh... Hello," I said.

"Mind if I come in?" he asked.

I stood aside for him and watched as he came in. I became acutely aware of the mess. I had old vinyl records messily stacked in one corner of the room and clothes everywhere. The only clear space was the futon. I closed the door and leaned against it.

"Your windows are covered. To stop daylight?" he asked.

"Yup. It's a great trick. Humans used it during the second world war," I said, eyeing him carefully. He kept a watch on me as I moved around the room and almost seemed annoyed when my eyes flickered down his body. He had a nice ass, what could I say?

“I’m going to just ask this once. Did you kill the guy in room four?” he asked.

I blinked. “No. I didn’t. For one, I don’t kill people when I feed and second, I’ve lived long enough to make sure I’m discreet. Oh, and let’s not forget the age old proverb- don’t shit where you eat. Except in my case it’s running a successful business and not bringing vampire stuff through my front doors.”

He looked me in the eye- I think. It’s hard to tell behind that white fabric in his domino mask. His body language changed. It seemed a little more friendly.

“Alright. I believe you. Do you think the murder is vampire related?” he asked.

I crossed my arms. “I haven’t managed to take a look but I have a suspicion. If it is, the vampire who caused it will be left out for sunlight. It’s so rude and disrespectful to kill on my property.”

Nightwing leaned against a bookcase. “Did you actually break into a blood bank?”

I walked over to my hiding spot and pulled out the empty blood bag to show him. “Not my favourite method of getting a bite to eat but didn’t really have much of a choice.”

He was quiet. “What is your method?”

I held up my phone. “Tinder. I like finding the assholes who need taking down a peg. I don’t kill. You really don’t have to. Takes some self control and training to get to this0 but learning how is useful for surviving. I go to a few clubs if I can’t find any matches.”

Nightwing didn’t speak.

“I used to try and survive off of animals but it’s not as nutritious,” I said. I apparently could not shut up. “You know, if you could help me get into the crime scene, I could try and find something to track down our killer?”

He nodded. “I have a contact in the police department. I’ll talk to them. See if we can get you in before the place is deep cleaned. Maybe to the morgue too.”

Oh right! They would have taken the body. I don’t know why I expected it to still be in there. Come to think of it, if it was still there, I would have smelled it long before now.

“That would be useful,” I nodded, realising I hadn’t said anything for a few seconds.

Nightwing looked around before exiting. “I’ll come to check in with you tomorrow. Be nice to the good detective.”

He closed the door behind him as he left.


End file.
